The Self-image of self-confidence

Self-confidence is a 'feeling of trust in your own abilities, qualities and judgement." Essentially this means that you are comfortable in your own skin. You like yourself. Self-confidence means that you know that you can do what you say you can do. It also means that you trust yourself to make good choices. When you have self-confidence, it becomes important to your self-image to make decisions that are in your best interest.

I love me

For clarities sake, I want to make the distinction between self-confidence and self-esteem. Confidence is the measure of your abilities. Esteem means to like, admire, and hold in high regard. Self-esteem is your ability to do this for yourself: to like, admire and value yourself. It is about your sense of self - your thoughts and emotions. It influences how you perceive and interact with (and in) the world. 

Note: Self-confidence and self-esteem aren't always a couple. It's a thing to be full of self-confidence, (in your abilities) but not necessarily like or have esteem for themselves.

Further, self-image is what you think about yourself. It is about what you tell yourself about what, and who you are. Self-image is influenced by what you think others think about you - your weight, attractiveness, intelligence etc.

While we are here let's talk about self-worth. Self-worth is more likely how you perceive yourself compared to others - skills, wealth, attractiveness etc. The thing about self-worth if you are comparing yourself to others is you will always find someone either lesser or greater than you. Your self-worth must be rooted in your unique beauty and genius. You are worthy, just because you are YOU.

Now, for an honorable mention, I'd like to mention self-respect. Your self-respect is unconditional and independent of how others see you. Self-respect is about is acceptance of yourself, just as you are. Unlike self-esteem which is dependent up on you liking yourself.

Which "self" resonates with you? I am attracted to self-respect because it can be the one thing that is unconditional. It's possible to have self-respect without regard to your achievement, appearance or anything else other than just for being you - because you are worthy. I guess this means I am also attracted to self-worth. I love this idea of knowing that I am worthy for no particular reason at all, other than just because I am

How Industry influencers build self-confidence

Make Health & Wellness a Priority

Maintaining good healthy habits make for a better life, well-lived. Putting your attention on your health and wellness means that you make a priority your whole self - mental, emotional, physical, occupational, intellectual and spiritual elements of your life.

Wellness matters because everything you do and every emotion you feel relates to your well-being. Your well-being directly impacts your thoughts, your actions and your habits.

Take Care Of (and In) Your Environment

Where you live and work has a direct impact on your health, wellness and success. Your environment must be comfortable and purposeful. Create a relaxing atmosphere in  each of your spaces. your bedroom for better slumber; a functional kitchen to cook with efficiency; and productive office space for getting things done. 

Practice Positive Self-Talk

Make it a daily practice to start your day by telling yourself something good. Send yourself into the world feeling inspired and energized. Give yourself some praise and celebrate the small wins throughout the day. You are your best cheerleader, your best advocate and your best friend. Celebrate you, regularly.

Maintain an Attitude of Gratitude

Another practice to do throughout your day is to periodically take a moment to give thanks for whatever you have, or whatever you're doing right now. Paying bills for example, is often thought of as a chore, something to dread. I like to give thanks that I have a home so I am gratitude for the mortgage AND the business that brings in the income to keep the lights on AND the physical strength to pump the gas, although none of the above is on my list of favorites to do, I am aware of the good fortune to have the experiences.

Spend Quality Time with Yourself

Self-awareness is the conscious knowledge of yourself, your own character. feeling, thought, motives and desires - according to the Oxford dictionary. Self-awareness is essential to self-confidence because when you have a better understanding of yourself, you are able to experience yourself as unique and separate individual. 

You are empowered to evolve and grow in order to build on your strengths. This is also true to help you identify and develop areas where you would like to make improvements.

Be a Lifelong Learner

Continuing education is the best way to stay sharp and hone your expertise. Learning new things and expanding your perspective helps you to become well verse about the world around you. When you continue to acquire new skills and enhance your capabilities, it increases your opportunities for success. 

As a lifelong learner, you not only study new topics but equally as important, you will develop an open-minded positive attitude about the nuances of culture, community and experiences.

Let Your Values Be Your Guide

Each of us have a moral code that defines who we are. Those values guide our actions. The guiding principles that you establish for your life - and in your business, should be the driving force upon which everything else resides. Your values represent you and what you stand for. You gain unshakable confidence when you stand within your value system. 

Your personal values remind you of the things that are important to you. They motivate and inspire your decisions so you can be sure that you are living your best life.

Become Solution Focused

This one is short and sweet... don't get stuck focusing on the problem. Rather, focus on the possible solutions. You can find away around issues, roadblocks and barriers if you give your attention to your desired result(s). 

Always Groom in the Basement

It is true that when you look good, you feel good. Self-grooming exemplifies your personality and your values. It enhances your assets so you can present the best version of yourself. Think about a time when you were so fresh and so stood taller, you had a stride in your step and a swagger in your walk. You were confident. You exhibited high self-esteem. 

There are times in our lives when we feel down, we get the blues and experience feelings of disappointment. These moments of depression, I refer to as time spent in the basement. During these moments, we generally aren't inspired to dress well. Depending on the cause for the basement visit, you may not feel up to taking a bath, putting on make-up or ironing your clothes, (wow, I am dating myself with this one LOL.) Anyway, I contend, these are the moments that you should really give attention to your personal grooming, especially when don't "feel" like it. Remind yourself of how amazing you are by seeing a reflection in the mirror about how amazing you are.

People in general respond positively to a well-groomed person.

Stand Tall, Be Tall & Go Forth

Before I tell you the tenth thing that you can do to build your self-confidence, I am going to first admit that I realize at first sight this one may not seem impactful, but it is. At times of disappointment my great-grandmother would tell me to "stand tall, walk tall...and carry a big stick." This directive means to be confident, self-assured and let others know that you mean business. It is true that "carrying a big stick" may not be necessary every time you have a set back, or maybe it is? However, holding your head high and improving your posture will help to improve your confidence, mood and overall health. 

When you stand up taller and when you pull your shoulders back your brain gets a signal that it's self-assured. The charge you get from a boost of empowerment will put you in charge of your emotions and urge you to make more confident choices.

Sitting up straight in your chair isn't just good for your also gives you more confidence in your own thoughts, according to a new study. Researchers found that people who were told to sit up straight were more likely to believe thoughts they wrote down while in that posture concerning whether they were qualified for the job. ~Science Daily

Self-confidence comes from your positive experiences. Every time your success is based on own skills, personality, and choices it reinforces your power. These experiences become the norm. Before long, it will become second nature to trust yourself. And when you are feeling insecure, it won't take you as long to come out of the basement.

Is there anything in particular that you do to give yourself a boost of self-esteem? In your experience, what works and what is a total waste of time? Share your thoughts below. 


Andrea Callahan inspires passionate & purpose-driven brands to maximize their strengths to craft an image that represents their WHY, and then use that WHY to position themselves as Industry Influencers; who share experiences that attract their Ideal Buyers. Callahan is a speaker, seminar leader, and the author of, "It's Your Brand ~ Make Your Identity Clear." Callahan is also the principal brand manager @ACIagency, a high-end boutique, integrated-marketing agency, specializing in helping locally-owned brands share their WHY.

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